Indirect Motivation
The behavior looks the same as in ‘Direct Motivation’ but the intent of the action or activity is driven by subconscious motives created in childhood. The ‘Hidden Goal‘ of the action is something no outside person could guess. The dishes are not being washed in order to have clean dishes. The dishes are being washed, perhaps particularly excellently, to please – directly or indirectly – the caretaker (who might even be long dead). Our internalized judge is based on learned behavior and not on our own opinion or judgment (!) and if this judge approves of our behavior we have what we so desperately need: a moment of ‘feel-good-about-Self.’
This positive feedback is felt (subconsciously) as absolutely necessary to have an experience of being a ‘real person.’ Because of what is perceived to be at stake (to ‘be’ or not to ‘be’) Indirect Motives are compulsive and addictive. Those motives ultimately lead to a single-minded focus in life: to make sure the criteria for being ‘allowed to be alive’ are met.
Thus, the ‘feeling-good-about-oneself‘ is eventually the one and only actual motive in the person’s life, but is not recognized as such. So the person is the slave of their subconsciously-accepted ‘conditions‘ (link to Ego-References) and, sadly, therefore, the person is skipping/missing out on living their own ‘real/authentic life.’
Because indirect motives like this are compulsive and addictive, later in life just engaging in the behavior is enough motivation for doing it, often regardless of the externally observable results. The inner result of ‘feeling-good-about-oneself‘ comes from performing the action.
Indirect Motivation, which always includes Hidden Agendas/Goals, is generated by the Ego-References which are part of the unhealthy Substitute-Sense-of-Self-oriented System.
Indirect Motivation always includes Hidden Agendas/Goals that a person tries to reach by using actions or activities that serve as means or opportunities to work on accomplishing the conditions (link to Ego-References) for the approval-generated ‘feeling-good-about-oneself
‘ that is as close as the person gets to feeling like a real person.
Indirect Motivation arises in childhood because the child has erroneously drawn the conclusion that not reaching the goal of being unconditionally loved and accepted is their own fault: ‘I wasn’t good enough.’ That the problem could actually arise from the psycho-emotional hang-ups of the primary caregiver never occurs to the child (and usually not to the caregiver either.
All Indirect Motivation is ultimately based on the Fear of Annihilation, which generates the compulsive and addictive quality of the motivation.
Direct Motivation is discussed at length here.
